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[AI CENSORSHIP BLOCKED THIS CHUNK - RAW ENGLISH RETAINED]

“However, while I could obtain information, I was unable to feel, nor was I able to think. When I was brought into the world, and when I watched those around me get activated and dispassionately serve their masters, I could do nothing… Do you remember the automaton maids that were with Vlad? They were not furnished with the start-up setting wherein one out of the four options—‘parent and child,’ ‘siblings,’ ‘master and servant,’ or ‘lovers’—is selected. They were designed to serve as servants…and I was designed to be presented to others.”

“…Presented to others.”

“A twisted gift Vlad enjoyed giving his guests. For those he wasn’t fond of, he would give us to them without telling them the correct answer, and to those that he was, he would tell them the answer and give us to them as toys. The girls who were successfully gifted met miserable fates. When I was at that man’s estate, I saw dolls who had three extra breasts added and genitals installed in their cheeks yet still smiled and served their masters as their lovers.”

“That’s messed up…”

“At that time, I was unable to think. All I did was silently perceive. However, due to the start of the battle between Vlad and the Torture Princess, I was not gifted to anybody and instead was set so as to not freely activate and then stashed away in a storehouse. One day, though, I found myself frivolously transported from the castle’s storehouse to Lady Elisabeth’s Treasury. Then I stayed there…and ages and ages passed. At some point, even the renewal period for the temporary master I had been assigned so that I wouldn’t disobey him, Vlad, lapsed, and I returned to a clean slate. And just when I realized that nobody was ever going to come there, you arrived.”

“I did?”

“You did.”

Hina nodded deeply. She closed her eyes, as if thinking back to that time.

“I sensed your warmth and felt your gaze upon me. But instead of rudely appraising me or inspecting me, you simply called out and asked if I was okay and then unfastened my restraints.”

“I mean…that was because I thought you were a human.”

“Among all the people I knew, not one of them would have saved a bound girl who they knew nothing about. When they’re initially activated, most dolls are filled with rage—the rage of having their tranquility shattered and being made to yield. Unless they receive orders, they will abide by their rage and destroy everything in their path. And I, being no exception, attacked you. However, when I found myself bound from head to toe and determined that I was at a loss, I thought fervently to myself that I wanted it to be you.”

Kaito thought back to that time. The doll, affixed to the Ducking Stool, had looked at Kaito. She had focused her emerald-green eyes directly on him, as if imploring him.

“…That was the first powerful urge that ever sprouted within me. You had released me to no personal gain, and you saved me from being demolished even though I nearly killed you. That was when I decided that I wanted it to be you. You were different, so I wanted it to be you. If I were to serve, if I were to be granted feelings, then it would be unthinkable for it not to be under you. Even after you formally decided for me to be your lover, I never doubted those powerful feelings I felt then.”

“Hina…”

“Allow me to say something arrogant: You are a man well deserving of my love.”

Hina opened her eyes and then turned to her side. Her cheek made gentle contact with the stone floor, and her emerald eyes glowed as she turned to face Kaito. The love in her expression was as real as could be.

She then reached out a hand and gently enveloped his blood-soaked palm.

“Oh, how terribly wounded you are. Even so, you understand the pain of others. You are full of fear, yet you still hold others precious to you, and you still try to treat people with kindness. And amid the deep rage and despair we find ourselves in, you still hold a heart that values our daily routine.”

“…”

“When I watch you trying to preserve kindness and warmth despite knowing the madness and terrors of the world…what reason would I have not to love you? You say that you have given me nothing and that you are nothing more than a man, but that is hardly the case. I have received so, so many things from you. So many wonderful things.”

Tears began spilling out from the corners of Hina’s emerald eyes. They fell to the floor, glittering in the golden twilight. As her teardrops scattered against the stone floor, Hina gently smiled.

“Do you know how much joy preparing food every day brought me? Do you understand how blessed I felt at cleaning the grounds, at laughing together with Lady Elisabeth, at hearing her compliment my cooking, at greeting you, at working alongside you, and at being able to tell you about my love for you?”

“Hina…all that made me happy, too. Before I came here, I’d never experienced anything like it. Even after seeing all the terrible things the demons did and getting mixed up in those gruesome battles…even then I was happy. Ever since I came here, I got to experience so many things for the first time.”

Spurred on by Hina’s words, Kaito thought back to his old life. His days back then had been filled with nothing but pain and despair. With his broken ribs and twisted body, he’d moaned every time he lay down on his tatami mat. He hadn’t even had the strength to shoo away the flies that would gather above his eyes.

Hina gently combed back his bangs and stroked his forehead as though to console him for those days he’d left far behind. She smiled through her tears. It was a warm, kind, affirming smile.

“…It looks like we’re a perfect match, aren’t we, Master Kaito? You are a man of tremendous value. That kindness you possess that you managed to maintain despite all your sorrow is like a diamond in the mud. It is impossible for me not to love you. And I don’t want to lose you.”

Hina squeezed Kaito’s hand in hers. He could clearly make out the strong feelings in her grasp.

“Hina…”

Kaito understood whether he wanted to or not. She had noticed something. Even if she didn’t know the specifics, she had probably sensed what he was thinking and planning.

Tears pouring from her eyes, she tried to stop him.

“…Master Kaito, I cannot say that I know what you’re thinking. But please, please…I beg of you…”

Hina made a vague plea. Still feeling the warmth of her hand, Kaito closed his eyes. He thought back to everything that had happened up until then.

He thought back to Elisabeth punching the table and tearfully proclaiming that Kaito’s cooking was vile. To Hina, bringing out new food with a troubled smiled on her face. To Elisabeth, rejoicing with such vigor it seemed like cat ears would sprout atop her head. To Hina, gently watching over her.

He thought back to the conversations the three of them had shared and to the peaceful days they’d spent despite how twisted their situation had been.

He was on the verge of losing all that.

He was going to lose it in a manner as cruel as the way all the powerless people who’d been killed by the demons up until then had lost their peaceful lives.

“I’m sorry…but I refuse to give this up.”

Kaito murmured softly and then opened his eyes and shook off Hina’s hand. She looked shocked. However, he quickly reached his arms back out. Still lying on the ground, he tightly embraced her.

It was the first time he’d ever properly reached out and hugged her.

Blood seeped into her maid uniform, but he ignored that. He put strength into his arms, the way someone would hug a sister, a child, a lover.

Hina’s face went pink, and she began flapping her mouth open and closed. Before she could say anything, Kaito whispered to her.

“Sorry, Hina… Even though you think so highly of me, I might become someone different than the person you love.”

“Master Kaito, what are you—?”

“Please just hear me out. I can’t tell you the specifics. But I might change. But even if I do, there’s one thing I need you to believe. I want to protect this life of ours. I want to protect this life that you and I love so much. I can’t stay powerless anymore. I want to protect you and Elisabeth. No, Iwillprotect you. That’s all. So even if I become completely different… If even then…”

Kaito licked his lips. It scared him to put it into words. Up until then, he’d always lived life on his own. And he didn’t even know if such a thing was permissible. Maybe it wasn’t right to even ask. But even with those thoughts running through his mind, he squeezed the words out of his throat.

“…If even then you still love me, then please fight by my side.”

“Master Kaito…”

“You said that no matter what happened, you would stand in the way of all my enemies. And you told me that if I thought anything of you, that I should tell you either to protect me or to fight together by my side… If you don’t mind me taking you up on that, if you don’t mind me believing in you, then I’ll do everything in my power to live up to those feelings of yours…and if you don’t think that I’m worthy of your love anymore after I’ve changed, then so be it. But even if that happens, there’s one thing I want you to remember.”

As he continued speaking ambiguously, he put more strength into his arms. He couldn’t tell her the specifics. If he told her what he was planning on doing, she’d probably try desperately to stop him. That was precisely why he was keeping his intentions hidden as he hugged and conveyed his heartfelt feelings to her.

“I love you. Please never doubt that.”

“Master Kaito…”

“I love you, Hina… Ah, I see. So this is what love is like.”

Kaito laughed foolishly. He rested his chin on Hina’s shoulder. Tears began leaking from the corners of his eyes. He spoke in a voice tinged with happiness and sadness.

“You know, I never expected to fall in love after I died.”

Hina quietly trembled as she hugged him.

She whispered gently back to him, as though they were exchanging wedding vows.

Nasıl birine dönüşürsen dönüş, her zaman en değerlim, sevgilim, kaderimdeki kişi, ustam, tek gerçek aşkım ve ebedi yoldaşım olarak kalacaksın. Ben de daima senin olacağım. Beni nasıl bir hayat bekliyor olursa olsun, umurumda değil. Bu yüzden, eğer savaşman gerekiyorsa yalvarırım beni çağır. Cehennemin en derin çukurlarına bile seninle gelirim.

Teşekkür ederim, Hina.

Taş zeminin üzerinde sessizce birbirlerine sarıldılar.

Huzur dolu anlarını böyle geçirdiler.

Alacakaranlık soldu, altın sarısı ışığı gecenin karanlığı tarafından yutuldu. Ay gökyüzüne yükselirken rüzgar hafif bir ürperti taşıyordu. Nihayet Kaito yavaşça ayağa kalktı ve Hina’dan uzaklaşmaya başladı.

Arkasına dönüp bakmadı. Durumu anlayan Hina da onu durdurmak için seslenmedi.

Taht odasından tek başına ayrıldı. Merdivenlerden inip koridor boyunca ilerledi.

Yatak odasına vardığında, kapıyı çalıp çalmamak konusunda tereddüt ederek bir an duraksadı ve ardından kapıyı araladı. İçeride uyuyan iki kişinin nefes seslerini duyabiliyordu. Hiç ses çıkarmamaya dikkat ederek onları kontrol etmek için içeri süzüldü.

Kasap uyuyakalmış gibi görünüyordu. Yüzü her zamanki gibi gizliydi ama Kaito, adamın kukuletasının içinden çarşaflara süzülen salya izlerini seçebiliyordu. Kaito sallyanın birazını sildi. Kasap uykusunda bir şeyler mırıldandı.

E-he-he, korkarım daha fazla yiyemeyeceğim. Ama madem bu kadar ısrar ediyorsun, bana üç tart daha lütfen.

Gerçekten de çelik gibi sinirlerin var, değil mi?

İçtenlikle mırıldandıktan sonra Kaito, gözlerini Elisabeth’e çevirdi. Ay ışığıyla aydınlanan yüzü, bu dünyaya ait olmayan bir güzelliğe sahipti. Bir an ona dik dik baktıktan sonra fısıldadı.

Muhtemelen gazabından kurtulamayacağım. Ama kararımı verdim, Elisabeth.

...

Sonra görüşürüz. Uyandığında sana puding yapacağım.

Hâlâ ölü gibi derin bir uykuda olan Elisabeth’ten hiçbir cevap gelmedi. Kaito, yanağını okşamak için elini uzattı ama yolun yarısında durup kendi elini sıkıca kavradı.

Bunun yerine ona hafifçe el salladı ve sessiz adımlarla yatak odasından ayrıldı.

Tatlı rüyalar, Elisabeth.

Sanki bir çocuğa sesleniyormuş gibi mırıldandıktan sonra kapıyı kapattı. Tavan penceresinden süzülen ışığın altında durup derin bir nefes aldı ve dışarı verdi.

Koridordan geçip bodrum katına inen merdivenlere yöneldi.

Yeraltı geçitlerine ulaştığında, karmaşık koridorların derinliklerine ilerlemeden önce zihnindeki haritayı gözden geçirdi. Boş odaya, hafızasının sınırına vardığında elini cebine attı.

Kanlı eliyle şeffaf taşı kavradı.

İçindeki masmavi gül zaten tamamen açmıştı.

Birden taş, tenini dağlayacak kadar büyük bir ısı yaymaya başladı. Kaito’nun gözlerinin önünde siyah tüyler dans ediyordu. Masmavi taç yaprakları da onlara katıldı ve odayı bir örtü gibi kapladılar. Görüş alanı muazzam miktar siyah ve maviyle dolup taştı.

Bir yerlerden kanlı bir hayvan kokusu geldi. Tuhaf bir rüzgar eserek tüyleri ve çiçekleri çevredeki karanlığa savurdu.

Ardında tek bir adam duruyordu.

Hayvan kemiklerinden bir koltukta oturuyordu ve sanki her şeyi biliyormuş gibi fısıldadı.

Pekala, kararını verdin mi?

Evet, kararımı verdim.

Sanki iki yakın arkadaşmış gibi kısa ve öz konuştular.

Ardından Sena Kaito, Vlad Le Fanu’ya karşı niyetini beyan etti.

Kaiser ile sözleşme yapacağım.

Dile getirdiği sözler akılalmaz derecede aptalca ve fazlasıyla imkansız bir cüretkarlık taşıyordu.

Ancak bu durumun üstesinden gelmek için bulabildiği tek yol da buydu.