Chapter 5: The Beach Has It In for Our Timely Arrival

[AI CENSORSHIP BLOCKED THIS CHUNK - RAW ENGLISH RETAINED]

“There are four minutes and twenty-three seconds until we’re due to leave. Hurry up, maggots!”

It was the final day of July. There wasn’t a cloud in the bright blue sky as the sun blazed down on us. Ozu was brandishing a teacher’s cane and shouting orders at Iroha, Sumire, and me while we were packing the car with the stuff we needed for the trip. We had swimming rings, boards, beach balls, parasols, sunglasses, a case with our swimwear in it, and sandals with soles that were way too high.

In case you’re wondering about that last one, Sumire said she needed them to give off the impression that she was a way taller and more intimidating woman than she was, because otherwise the surfer boys might try and pick her up and assault her in the shadows of the cliffs.

Or, to give a shorter explanation, she was an idiot.

We were drenched in sweat as Ozu worked us like slaves. I paused behind the car as Sumire leaned in to whisper to me.

“Is it just me, or is Ozuma-kun acting weird?”

“You think so?”

“Yeah! He’s supposed to be the handsome, kindhearted, princely type! Why is he hazing us like we just joined the OZ special forces?”

“Well, he still looks and sounds like the class prince we all know and love.”

“That’s why it’s terrifying! He called us maggots like he was complimenting our hair!”

“Wait, you don’t know, do you? This is how he is when you ask him to take care of something. He cares more about scheduling and timetables than I do. You should count yourself lucky that I’m so patient with your deadlines, or you’d have him to deal with.”

“Wh-Why? What if he was in charge of getting the illustrations from me?”

“He’d get those drawings from you by any means. He’d make my methods look like I was fooling around.”

“Th-That’s news to me. I didn’t know there was a secret boss fight lurking behind you...”

“Stop shit-talking over there.” Ozu cracked the cane against the ground.

“Eeek! He swore with a smile on his face! Aaah!”

“I can hear you. Look, I’ve calculated the best schedule for us, based on how long till mom gets home, how crowded the beach is gonna be, and how much time we should spend fooling around to have the most fun possible—among other stuff. Took all night. I just don’t want all my hard work to go to waste. Is that so bad?”

“Sir, no, sir! Not bad at all, sir!” Sumire gave a hearty salute.

“His calculations are perfect too,” I explained, glancing back at her. “We’re guaranteed not to get stuck in traffic if we follow his route. Okay, that’s the last of my stuff in.”

I grabbed the towel from around my neck and wiped the sweat from my face.

Ozu crossed his arms and gave an approving nod. “Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister.”

“No thanks.” And when did Ozu become an American drill sergeant?

“C’mon, Ozuma. This is Senpai we’re talking about. He doesn’t know how to do that kinda stuff.” Said sister Iroha suddenly appeared behind me.

She was wearing a sporty, short-sleeved T-shirt complete with a miniskirt. Standard fashionable attire for any high school girl in summer. Just like when she hung out in my room, she had that pair of headphones around her neck. Without fear of her mom catching sight of her, Iroha was free to express herself entirely as she wanted for this trip.

Iroha grinned, grinding her fingertip against my cheek. “If either of us is gonna do the fucking, it’s gonna be me!”

“If any of your classmates heard you say that word with that smile, they’d throw a fit.”

Hey, guys. The representative of your entire year who gave such a wonderful speech at the closing ceremony and is such a perfect little honor student just said “fucking.”

Reality can be soul-destroying.

“Who cares? It’s not like we’re at school right now! Why do I gotta be all super serious when we’re just hanging out like this?”

“I guess. But you should still be careful, even though it’s summer vacation. Don’t forget you’ve got homework.”

“I won’t! My grades are top-notch, y’know! Better than yours, anyway.”

“Unfortunately, you’re right.”

Kohinata Iroha was top of her year, which was also why she was chosen to give a speech at the ceremony. She came in top in the end-of-term tests too, making her the envy of all her classmates.

“When did you even get so smart?” I asked.

“I was born this way, baby!”

“Liar. You were pretty average in junior high school, right? D’you know how shocked I was to hear you actually got into our high school?”

Academically, our school was above average, and most of its students had their sights on going to college after graduation. Most of the time my classmates and the people I hung out with looked like nothing more than a bunch of primates, but I promise that a lot of them are good at studying at least. That was why the top student in our year, Midori, and the top student in the first grade, Iroha, actually compared pretty well on a national scale. You could even justify calling them prodigies.

“It’s ’cause you helped me study! You did the entrance exam yourself, so I basically got insider knowledge on how to pass from you. Where would I be without such a gullible—I mean, helpful—Senpai?”

“I heard that.”

“Whatever, just make sure you work hard this year too! I need to leech off your success!” Iroha gave me a hearty pat on the back, which I really could’ve done without.

“What are you on about, Iroha? Didn’t you study really hard because you wanted to get into the same school as A—”

“Aaah! Stop right there!” Iroha shoved whatever was in her hands into Ozu’s mouth. “You can’t go around spillin’ all your sister’s secrets!”

“Hey, Iroha-chan! That’smybag!” Sumire protested.

“Wh-Why is that a secret?!” Ozu gasped once his mouth was free. “Why don’t you just make a move already? This’ll be your chance to get ahead of Tsukinomori-san.”

“It’s none of your business! Let me do things at my own pace, yeah?” Iroha pouted and turned her face away from her brother.

It was rare to see them quarrel like that. I wasn’t even sure what they were arguing about.

“Oh.” Iroha’s face fell. “It’s a shame Mashiro-senpai can’t make it. Do you really think she’ll be okay with not coming?”

“I asked her a hundred times if she was sure.”

“She said the beach is too busy, but I swear she was looking forward to it before.”

That’s right. There were only four of us here: me, Iroha, Sumire, and Ozu. Makigai Namako-sensei wasn’t here because he’s Makigai Namako-sensei. Mashiro was supposed to be coming with us, but yesterday she called to say she couldn’t all of a sudden.

“I’m sorry. I was looking forward to going, and I was gonna go, but...” I could still hear the sad tone in her voice from that phone call. “I...can’t go anymore. I think I’m gonna be busy all summer...”

I asked her why several times, but she wouldn’t tell me. All she did was apologize. I even knocked on her door, Room 501, but she didn’t respond. I didn’t know whether she was ignoring me or if she was out, but I couldn’t get in touch with her after our phone call.

“What about leaving her alone? I thought you woulda forced her to join,” Iroha said.

“What kind of guy do you think I am?”

“It’s true. You coulda broken in and kidnapped her or something. Y’know, like a bandit stealing away the young maiden of the village.”

Excuse you, Iroha. I’d never resort to such lows...would I? Looking back at my life was making me doubt myself, so I shook away my thoughts and doubled down.

“If shewantedto go but couldn’t, then I might force her. It sounds to me, though, that Mashiro’s decided there’s something more important than the beach. That’s the feeling I got anyway.”

“Senpai...”

I still remembered Mashiro, flopped down on her desk and muttering something about a deadline. If she was talking about a contest for new writers like I thought, then that meant she was giving up the beach to work on pursuing her dream. If coming along meant she would miss the deadline, then that was simply inefficient from the viewpoint that it was delaying her finding happiness.

“To be honest though, I don’t know for sure why she turned us down.”

“I know, but—gah!”

Iroha was looking up anxiously at the corner room on the fifth floor. She let out a squeak as she was suddenly embraced from behind.

“You’re such a good girl, Iroha-chan! All the worrying in the world won’t make it so she can come with us. It’s better just to let loose and make the most of the trip!”

“Sumire-chan-sensei?”

“It’s her fault for turning us down! So let’s just have a ton of fun without her!”

“I guess I get it...but Mashiro-senpai’s my friend. I can’t help but worry a little.”

“Oooh, so serious! Such a good girl, Iroha-chan! Here!” Sumire began to ruffle Iroha’s hair. She then grinned and gave her a thumbs-up. “Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister.”

“What is this, some kind of sister-fucking cult?” Even Iroha had a limit to how much nonsense she could take.

“Iroha and Sumire-sensei’s sister, huh?” I pictured them in my mind.

Sumire’s sister, Midori. How would Iroha fuck her? Oh, wait. Two girls meant yuri. In my opinion, yuri is too pure an environment for a filthy word like fuck, but anyway, with Iroha’s confidence, she would totally be the top, and she’d push Midori down on the bed before undoing her uniform buttons slowly, one by one, and then hold on where am I going with this? Time to stop. Stop!

Luckily, my sanity was restored by bashing my head against a nearby utility pole a few times.

“Wh-What are you doing, Senpai?”

“Just trying to keep everything PG-13.”

“Huh?”